finding consistency in the inconsistent

The thing about life is that you never know what a year can do to you.

This time next year, things could be completely different.

In fact, they will be.

Some people stay in your life for a moment, while others stay and never leave.

It’s a hard, sad truth that leaves me winded every once in a while.

Change.

I was never a fan of it growing up. It meant readjusting my plan to fit around something else.

I was a strong-willed child, or rather, possessed “strong leadership qualities.” Change was not my forte. Although over the years I have grown more used to the adapting process, chance is never easy.

In fact, I don’t think it ever will be.

Thinking back to this day five years ago, I would not have predicted this is where I would be. Who I would become; who I am now.

Five years ago, my life was planned out in the way that wanted. had a plan and it was perfect…according to my standards, that is.

In my mind, Plan A would work, so why even think about a Plan B or Plan C or Plan Q? Plan A was the only thing I thought about because that was the only thing that would work. It had to.

False.

Over the years, God has been teaching me that HIS plans are perfect, not mine.

Every obstacle I faced, I struggled with letting go. It was not in my Plan A, therefore, this was not supposed to happen.

Let me tell you something.

You can plan and plan and plan, but that won’t change God’s plan for your life. Begging doesn’t help and neither does complaining.

Faith doesn’t make things easy; it makes things possible.

That is a very hard thing to come to grips with. Through the past couple of years, I’ve struggled and struggled with this. I’m not afraid to admit that sometimes, I struggle with being completely okay with where God’s put me in life.

Change; it’s a hard thing to conform to.

As time goes on, so do friendships. Some people walk right out of your life without ever looking back. The hardest change of all is the change of where you stand.

A chapter closes and you don’t even realize it’s closing until it does. It’s over, done, finished. It’s like the end of a great book– you don’t realize you’re at the last chapter, at the last page, until you read that last sentence, flip to the next page, and realize it’s blank.

You’re not mentally or emotionally prepared for the ending, but it still happens.

Today, “What a friend we have in Jesus” began playing on my Spotify playlist. I couldn’t listen to it at first. In a way, it seemed to mock what’s been on my mind lately. Then, I listened closely to the lyrics.

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Oh, what a friend we have in Jesus.

I listened to the words more intently then I ever have before.

People will leave your life.

They’ll leave and sometimes, you may never know why. They just do.

It’s a change in life, a chapter ending.

But guess what?

Friends will leave, but there’s one friend who never will.

Jesus.

He’s there, all the time. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever” Hebrews 13:18 states. That means that He’s the SAME friend he was yesterday, last week, last month…5 years from now, 5 years ago.

This doesn’t really have a cool happy ending where I suddenly burst into a huge smile and shout from the roof tops that all of a sudden, I can deal with the change of chapters. That I am 1200000% cool when things are all of a sudden not what they used to be, what I think they should be.

It’s still a challenge. It’s still a process of daily walking and growing in who God wants me to be. I am not the same person I was yesterday and I’m not the same person I will be tomorrow, but I’m learning to be okay with that.

People will leave my life, but others will enter. Chapters will close, but others will begin. Just because it’s a change doesn’t mean it’s bad.

My Plan A might be long gone (at this point, I’m on Plan Q probably), but that’s okay! It really is.

Life is inconsistent, but daily, I’m learning that even “inconsistency” is planned from the One who is consistent.

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